Monday, May 31, 2010

UN and UNICEF





I finally realize why I hate history -- so much of it revolves around wars and killings. Those of you who know me well, know that I don't believe in wars for any reasons. Wasn't that the original purpose of the United Nations? I love the gun sculpture for what it represent but it isn't enough. Now we have other horrible weapons: bombs, land mines, missile. There's an exhibit in the UN about land mines which cost very little to make but cause so much pain and suffering -- even after a war is over.

I was very upset when the U.S. decided to defy the UN and go to war with Iraq based on unsubstantiated "weapons of mass destruction" claims. If the U.S. can choose when to follow the UN rules, then so can all the other countries in the world. The whole system means nothing then.

During college and law school, I used to work in the basement of the UN volunteering with UNICEF. I even went a few weekends when I was a lawyer. It felt good to be there. I felt like I was contributing to making the world a better place. Did I really make a difference? Probably very little in the scheme of things. There were Christmas seasons spent sitting in bank lobbies selling UNICEF cards and gifts in order to raise money for children in need around the world. I'd like to think that some village got a water pump and some children were saved from polio because of my efforts.

UNICEF is one of the most important charities to me. Don't buy flowers for me when I die, just donate the money to UNICEF. The children of the world are innocently suffering and could use all the help they can get. Better yet, donate before I die. http://www.unicef.org/

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Religion


There is controversy brewing over a proposed mosque being build near Ground Zero.

I recently had some conversations about religion and the customs. Some things which came up were "why is it OK to have yamulkes with baseball team logos?" and "do you have to wash tsitsits in lingerie bags?" New questions included: "Is it OK to have a logo on a Bible or Koran?" "Why do people carry holy water in their purses?" "If God created Adam and Eve and we are all descendants from them, aren't we all related then?"

I have gone from being an atheist to an agnostic. I really think there is some other higher spirit but not sure what it is. I still don't understand all the distinctions between the Christians -- Baptist, Methodist, Lutheran, etc. And, I don't really care. If there was one interpretation of the Bible, then I might believe in it. I don't even really know the difference between the various religions and never really had a deep desire to figure it all out. It amazes me whenever there are people who can quote passages from the Bible -- not just the words but where in the Bible it came from. I have no desire to know anything that thoroughly. Call me shallow if you must.

Don't take this the wrong way...I respect all religions but have no desire to be a part of any one group. It seems that those in a religion always feel that their religion is the right one. This has been the root of way too many conflicts in history and modern times. So, don't hate me if I'm not part of your religion and ask silly questions.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Liars

Rule #1: Don't lie to me. If you lie to me, it means that you think you won't be caught and/or that I am too stupid to figure it out. I have worked so hard to teach my children that lying is bad, VERY bad. Once you've lied to someone and been discovered, damage has been done. Trust is lost. Your words will no longer mean as much. I have never made a promise I didn't intend to keep. If I know something may cause me not to be able to do something, I let the person know up front. Is that too much to ask for in return? When you've done something bad, own up to it. Don't lie, especially to me or my loved ones.

So, if you are a liar, reconsider being my friend. At some point you will be discovered and I will no longer trust you or believe you. I may forgive you but I will never fully embrace anything you say.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Time

Have you noticed how time seems to pass quicker as you get older? It used to be that "time flies when you're having fun." Now, it flies even when I'm not having fun. I thought life would be like a wind-up toy -- getting slower and slower. But NOOO....Each day I realize that I didn't do something I was supposed to do. Each week passes and I can't even remember what my time was spent doing. As I sleep less, you'd think I'd get more done, right?! Alas, I manage to waste what extra time I have. In a blink of the eye, my children have grown to be independent thinkers who are becoming pretty self-sufficient. I've spent countless hours nagging and coaxing them to do this or do that, and it's beginning to pay off. But only time will tell if I've had a good enough influence.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Facebook

When I first joined Facebook, it was to see photos of my nephew. I stayed for a few days and quit, thinking it was a big waste of time. A few weeks later I joined again, for whatever reason (I can't recall now). Since then I have a really fun group of friends who post and interact with me. Those who are lurking get weeded out every few weeks. I don't spend time on the various virtual games because I already spend way too much time on Webkinz (yeah, I share an account with M). Using Facebook helps us have a running conversation without having to all be in the same place at the same time (so hard to meet up nowadays with everyone's busy schedule). I log in each day at various times to see what's going on. In the morning, mid-day, and before I go to bed. Perhaps it's become an addiction. Some people are planning to quit on May 31st in protest to various privacy issues. I don't think I will though. I would feel like my friends are hanging out without me!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Glass Ceiling

This week's TIME magazine cover story is about the three women trying to clean up the Wall Street/Banking mess (which I think was created mainly by greedy, power-hungry men). One of the women was told by a partner of a New York firm to ask herself if she thinks she would ever be made a partner. When I had asked myself the same question about 15 years ago, my answer was "slim chance" -- being a female and Asian and a mother of two. But the real reason I left was because I realized I didn't want to be a partner in a big law firm. The partners I worked with may have made the big bucks but they were there late into the night when deals were nearing closing. Sure, the male partners were able to go see their children play sports or attend other family events more readily than an associate. I guess my problem was that there were no female partners with children to be my mentor. Heck, there weren't even any female associates with kids to talk to. I got my summer associate job when I was pregnant but didn't show until a few weeks into the job. Luckily I was already in the door and impressed them enough to get a job offer. It was a risk to have my first child while in law school. It was a great challenge to raise him while finishing law school and then when I started working. Let me just say that breaking the glass ceiling when you have children is way harder than breaking through when you're single or just married. Being Asian was another obstacle. There were times when I wished I were a white male so that I could get ahead but, in the end, I believe that all things are the way they are for a reason. I am happier now than when I was working with those white men and ever grateful that I didn't become one of them. I thought I was over the sexism and discrimination feelings. But....

Now I get to experience a different glass ceiling -- in the world of acting. Michael's dreams of being an actor are limited by his being Chinese. This seems to be one of the few fields where blatant discrimination based on ethnicity is acceptable. We knew this going in and have persevered. We know that the order of preference is Whites, Blacks, Latinos, and, last (yes last) are Asians. I guess the same holds true for sports such as baseball and basketball.

Maybe that's why we should move to China, where we won't be a minority. But, we will still be looked down upon because we aren't native Chinese and speak with funny accents.

Ah...what to do??

Friday, May 14, 2010

Sunshine & Vitamin D

I always knew sunshine made a difference in my mood. Now I know it also makes a difference in my health. I guess I always knew it gave us vitamin D but never thought I'd be lacking in that. Bad news came yesterday from the doc about my vitamin D level, as well as other stuff. When I researched a little, it turns out that all this time when I protected myself from the sun because of skin cancer fears, I wasn't getting vitamin D. Sure it is added to milk, cereals and breads but I don't eat those. It can be found in egg yolks which I'm not supposed to eat because of cholesterol problems. When I tried to go vegetarian, I wasn't even getting any from the fish I eat, from their oils. Since I don't pop pills (I include vitamins in the pill form as pills), I am in trouble!

Did you know that vitamin D deficiency can cause weak bones, muscle pains, depression, and fatigue? Yeah.

So, today I decided to forget my dietary restrictions for an hour and went out to breakfast after physical therapy and had two EGGS, WHITE bread with BUTTER, BACON, and POTATOES, with a cup of REGULAR COFFEE. I was good -- no sugar in my coffee! I will seek out the sun for 20 minutes this afternoon. So, no need to pop a vitamin D pill!!! Well, I'm already feeling happier :)

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Peace

Why can't we all live in peace? Why do people have to die in wars and acts of violence?

Some fight for religious reasons. Others fight for political reasons. Sometimes it's over land. What if everyone agreed to stop fighting? I don't just mean countries. I mean people everywhere. At home. In school. At work.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

UFOs

"UFO" usually means "unidentified flying objects." But in a quilter's mind, it stands for "unfinished object."

I have a tendency to begin something and not complete it before moving on to another project. As I get older, I've begun to think that I may have attention deficit disorder. Unless I have to finish something for a deadline -- wedding, birthday or show -- I can't seem to focus. Even when I am working with a deadline, it doesn't always happen. Here are two miniature quilts I started for the 2008 Empire Quilters show. I decided to go small so that I could make the blocks and quilt them in time for the show. I managed to get these photos taken in time for the submission deadline but never got them completed in time to hang in the show. There were so many other things to deal with that I put them aside in order to help get the show organized.

Since then, I've withdrawn a bit from the guild. I realized that I have trouble saying "no" when asked to help out. A few months ago I resigned from being a Core Group member of my CSA. Once in a while I need to put me first and do what I love, making things and being artistic. Besides these two UFOs, my Dear Jane quilt has been waiting for attention. I don't even know how many UFOs I have. When I thought I was going to die from breast cancer, sad to say, I started to think about all the unfinished quilts I had started and all those I had planned to start. When Mother's Day came and I had no present for Mommy, I decided to make her a heart applique quilt. I made the 12 blocks by Sunday but couldn't get it all together for even a top because she had me making a plarn tote bag for her (yet another UFO when the plarn ran out). Well, today I finished her plarn tote to her specifications and have one less UFO to worry about!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Goals

We all set goals for ourselves. Some are short-range while others are long-range. I have a calendar which helps me figure out what's going on for the month --I'm very visual. Each Sunday (or Monday if I didn't get to it), I write out my week's schedule. No major goals other than remembering to get to places on time and buying whatever we're low on at home.

My long-range goals are on my "bucket list" which is written in my gratitude journal. Some things have been achieved and are crossed off while other still wait patiently for me to get to them. Some goals are travel-related: visit all 50 states, Australia, Rome, Greece, and Egypt. Some are physical: run a mile and swim a lap. Others are mental: invent something useful and solve Rubik's Cube. I also want to get my children's book published one of these days and try skydiving.

None of my goals are specifically money-oriented but I do need money in order to travel. Maybe I should get moving on inventing something and getting my books published.

But, in general, my daily goal is do something nice for someone. My life goal is to leave this world a little better than when I came in.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Growing Up

I have worked hard to raise my children to become independent individuals who will contribute to society. But now I wish they would stay small and need me and think I am the most beautiful and smart person they know.

Some day they will move away (hopefully on good terms). It will be with joy and sorrow that I say good bye. I will miss them very much and probably call often to check on them.

What I really want though is for them not to forget about me.

Photo: My footprint next to M's on Hapuna Beach, Hawaii during summer of 2009

Friday, May 7, 2010

Patience

I acquired this special work of art from a Thunderbirds Indian auction a few years ago. It is a wooden bear that is covered with tiny seed beads set in beeswax. I was drawn to it by the colors and design. When I was told how it was made, I knew I had to have it.

Someone sat and made this, bead by bead. Patience. That is all I could think to myself. An artist for sure but a patient artist.

At times I can be just as patient and work on a time-consuming project but sometimes I just want to be finished with what I am making.

So, are you a patient person?

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Family Heirloom

These are the baby shoes each of my children wore. I remember buying them from Stride Rite in the Queens Center Mall for my first child. Back then I spent what money I made on him. Nice, expensive leather shoes. Nothing was too good for him.

When my second one was ready to walk, she got these hand-me-downs which were still in pretty good condition. But when she outgrew them, I passed them along to a close friend. Part of my constant de-cluttering project since I didn't plan on having any more children.

When my third child came along and was ready to walk, my dear friend gave me back the shoes. I had forgotten about them but was overjoyed to be able to have a family heirloom back.

Since I was too cheap to buy a new pair for each baby, the three of them will have to figure out who gets to keep them when I am gone. For now, they are proudly displayed in my wall unit.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Love


I often wonder what life would be like without love -- giving love and receiving love. I know I couldn't live without love. Unfortunately, some people on this earth are not getting much needed love.

The news reported about a Russian orphan being returned to Russia by his American "mother" because she couldn't handle him. His disorders were probably from being in an orphanage where he didn't feel loved. Sending him back was like a double-whammy, in my opinion. How will he ever understand what love is?

All the terrorism based on religious beliefs is so wrong. Discrimination based on skin color is so wrong. Treating women worse than men is so wrong. If we could all love each other, regardless of religion, race, ethnicity, whatever, then the chance there will be peace on earth increases.

I know.... it'll never happen. But wouldn't it be nicer to live in a world with people who feel loved?

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Pets

It's almost a year since Paul died. He was our pet Shitzu-Poodle dog for six years. We adopted him when he was already 12 years old. At that time I was praying that he would live at least a year. Otherwise, I would blame myself for not taking care of him. He outlasted anyone's predictions. The last two years of his life were difficult with the onset of medical conditions. In the end, I truly believe that he waited for Brian to get home from a one month stay in China. The day after Brian got home, Paul got so sick we had to take him to the vet to be put down. It was awful.

My friends would ask if I was getting another dog. I told them that I couldn't bear another loss like that. Perhaps it hurt so much because it brought back memories of my father's illness and having to give the DNR order just a year earlier. I swore I would never make that decision for another life, yet I had to again.

We do still have our turtle as a pet. He (or she) has been with us over 20 years -- longer than the children.

When I was growing up, we had fish most of the time. But, I also had hamsters and a chinchilla named Chubby. After I got married, Chubby was our pet and then I bought hubby the turtle for our first Christmas. Since then, we have also been caretakers of fish, hermit crabs, tadpoles/frogs, caterpillars/butterflies, snails, and a guinea pig.


Monday, May 3, 2010

Preparing for field trip

I went on a two mile walk around Jamaica Bay Wildlife Refuge to prepare for a walk I'm leading. I couldn't find my camera (until after I got home), so I was able to enjoy the walk listening to the sounds and viewing the birds with my binoculars. Luckily my sister and Joe were there to help me identify the birds.


Today, I woke up way too early but got some stuff prepared for the field trip. I made a dozen different photo tic-tac-toe games using photos of birds and plants I spotted yesterday at the refuge. It took way longer than I had planned. Sure hope the kids enjoy using them as a scavenger hunt.

I am tired of seeing Canada Goose everywhere but seeing a pair of geese with their goslings, fuzzy yellow and brown, waddling on the path, was priceless! We also saw a pair of Mute Swans with their cygnets. I really hope they are still around when the kids go on the walk.

These were my favorite birds from yesterday (not counting the babies).

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Creating and Giving










Why do I love to create things? I find it relaxing. It is challenging when I am trying something new. But, I think the main reason I create things is to give them away -- to spread happiness.

Once I am done making something, I like to give it away to a person who might appreciate it. What's the sense of giving away a creation which took time and energy (and money) to make? I don't expect anything in return, no quid pro quo. Just say "Thank you" and enjoy what I've given you. The things I donate may end up in the hands of someone who doesn't know the amount of care that went into its creation. So be it.

Most of my friends have received something I made with my hands -- quilt, drawing, sock monkey, pillow, scarf, stuffed monster, pysanka, blanket, etc. Many times, it is based on being at the right place, at the right time -- just when I am done making it. I also make stuff specifically for someone.

If you haven't received a handmade item from me yet, do you think you deserve one?